Public Service Announcement Number Three

by Kyla

What not to say to professors. Note, please, that these are real life examples of things that I have said to professors at this fine educational institution, all of which I did today. Do not do as I have done.

When seeing an unwanted assignment looming on the course syllabus, do not say, “Dude! What the f**k! Are you on crack?”*

Do not tell a professor that you love him/her**. It might sound really funny – and even true – to say to your buddy, “My professor and I have a love-tolerate relationship. I love him/her and s/he tolerates me,” the same statement sounds a little awkward when being spoken to the person in the question. Trust me, once you’ve said “I love you” to your professor, things only go down hill from there.

Do not tell a professor that the reason you like their discipline is because it involves no thought. Strangely, that can be misinterpreted.

During pre-exam question time, when people are asking pertinent questions like, should it be double-spaced and can we free write and do you care about spelling and is it open book and can I see the questions in advance, do not, in an attempt to get in the spirit of the whole question/answer thing, put up your hand and say, can I do an interpretive dance, instead? I’m just sayin’. Not A Good Idea.

*Yes, I really did this. Just today, in fact. Not. A. Good. Idea. I haven’t checked the handbook, but I’m pretty sure VIU frowns on this sort of thing.

**Unless you actually do love him/her in that way in which case I have only this to say: I haven’t checked the handbook, but I’m pretty sure VIU frowns on this sort of thing. Also, I am quite certain That Is Not A Good Idea, although in this particular case, I am not speaking from personal experience. Trust me, if I was speaking from personal experience, this blog would have a way higher hit count.