Ball State Basketball

by Kyla

According to Facebook (my source for all things), VIU will be playing Ball State University in basketball this coming Sunday.

I am rather fond of Ball State. Ball State, in case you don’t know, is in Indiana. Indiana, in case you don’t know, is in the United States, somewhat south-ish from Michigan and over to the right of Chicago, if you happen to be standing in Chicago and facing north.

I first got wind of Ball State back when I was finishing high school at a rather fine educational institution in Hawaii. I was not so fine. I spent most of those years sleeping in class, preparing me for a university education (the first time around) in which that kind of work ethic would come into good use (more on that later. Stay tuned).

So, there I was in Hawaii, not doing very well in school. My step-mother turned to me brightly one day and said, “Hey. David Letterman has a scholarship for C students.”

This was about the best news I had heard all year, and I immediately wrote David Letterman’s offices in New York to let him know that while I had been intending to start getting better grades, I’d be willing to keep aiming low if that would increase my chances of receiving his scholarship. I’d be happy to accommodate you, I promised, ever eager for an excuse to continue my heavy schedule of napping during American history. (To this day, I owe Ed Moore an apology. Sorry, Ed.)

Eventually someone from his office phoned me and explained that the scholarship was offered through Ball State University, all the way over there in Indiana. I didn’t know where Indiana was. It sounded far away, and mid-westernish, and so I never even applied. Instead I took my mediocrity to the University of Idaho, where I managed to drop out twice, and although enrolled for three semesters, eventually left with exactly 9 completed credits and a dismal – even by David Letterman standards – 1.7 GPA.

As it turns out, I ended up living in Indiana anyway, but that was years later. Trust me, Indiana is quite delightful. But you should think of it as even more delightful now that I alert you to this:

David Letterman really does offer a scholarship for C-ish students. In words that no doubt bring a song to the hearts of many, the scholarship criteria (and you can read them for yourself) happily state:

Grades are not a criterion or condition for eligibility or consideration.

There are a lot of reasons to love Indiana. You may have to take my word for this if you haven’t had a chance to be there yet (for one, I recommend a visit to the Dan Quayle Museum in Huntington). But I think Ball State’s excellent and, frankly, unusual scholarship has to be at the top of the why-to-love-Indiana list.

If you’re sitting there….. and you’re feeling a little uncertain about your GPA … I’m just sayin’ … there are places out there who love that sort of thing. Don’t be shy. You may be on your way to Indiana.